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SOME PERSONAL THOUGHTS PENNED IN NOVEMBER 2018
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I retired from full time employment in March 2016, having been Deputy Chief Executive of a largish Housing Association for 16 years, and prior to that working for the local Council for 25 years. It was time for a rest and having decided to take the early bath to spend more time with Julie; to keep watching County, (home and away); to spend the summer at Old Trafford, (Lancashire CCC not the other one!); and to go and see places far and wide. I was looking forward to it.
Cricket has been a love of mine since I was at primary school. I played at a reasonable level at University and then in the Central Lancashire League for Ashton, but I always enjoyed going to OT to watch Lancashire.
So, freed from the shackles of employment, I invested in a Membership and planned to spend much of the summer of 2016 down there in the company of Steve Painter, a friend of nearly 40 years standing. Steve never played the game, but loved his time watching Ashton and LCCC. He followed football, (with his love being Manchester City, from a time when they were the local team rather than the oil-rich entity it has become letterly), but kept a real interest in local non-league football in the Tameside area.
In 2014 with City games hardly ever being played at 3.00 on a Saturday he would have a season ticket at Edgeley Park – so we met up there as well. His ready wit, and fund of tales, always made days at any sport an enjoyable experience and I looked forward to his company. On Tuesday 5th April 2016 we watched Salford City win at Hurst Cross, (Ashton United), and walking out of the ground Steve told me he was having a week in Spain but would see me a week the following Monday at Old Trafford for the 2nd day of the Lancs v Nottinghamshire County Championship game.
That morning his wife, Ellen, texted me to say that he was a bit under the weather, and wouldn’t be going. I replied that I wasn’t going to OT the following day, due to an appointment elsewhere, but would see him at Hurst Cross the following evening, where Ashton were due to meet Halesowen in their quest for promotion from the Evostik Premier Division. The following morning I was in a meeting when a text came. It was from Ellen, and opening it was literally a blow to the solar plexus. I’ve still got it. “Hi bad news Steve has passed away. Still in shock”. My reply was “Truly truly sorry and gutted. Steve a dear friend to me but a rock to you”.
Two and a half years later I still feel the loss and I miss him incredibly.
Retirement wasn’t supposed to be this way…..
Over the months prior to retirement, and on the away trips, I had noticed that Jeff Lawrenson wasn’t walking well, dragging his feet and shuffling a lot. A call from him confirmed what I, even though totally naïve in terms of diseases, had probably worked out – he had been diagnosed with Parkinsons Disease. During the first few months of the 2016/17 season it was obvious that his reducing levels of mobility would inevitably mean that away trips would be not the norm but rather the exception. And so it has proved, with my great friend, and travelling companion for 25 years, being increasingly unable to go to games. It’s been a huge loss to me.
I still go to away games, but it’s not the same…….
Retirement wasn’t supposed to be this way…..
On Saturday 17th December 2016 County played, and comprehensively beat, Altrincham at Edgeley Park. Twenty four hours later, I was sitting, idly watching whichever of the Premier League games that Sky had designated as Super Sunday. Half way through the game there was the onset of toothache. Over the course of the evening extensive consumption of Paracetomol and other analgesics found in the medicine cabinet assuaged the pain not a jot.
Now, I’ve been a martyr to the dentist for the whole of my adult life, and must have kept him in business given the amount of cash I’ve handed over. But it’s left me with not too many teeth so the pain was a bit of mystery. To cut a long story short a visit to the dentist told me there was nothing wrong dentally, to which he added that his advice was to go and see a doctor. The advice cost me £60 – which turned out to be the best money I’ve ever spent.
Three visits to the doctor later, and a couple of blood tests, led to a referral to Tameside General Hospital Haematology Unit and a consultation. That was on 16th January 2017. The following day I was more than half way to Brackley for an FA Trophy replay when the car-phone rang. It was the consultant’s Secretary who told me I was required for a bone marrow extract 48 hours later.
To cut yet another long story short it all ended up with a diagnosis of multiple myeloma, (cancer of the bone marrow). I can’t say that the actual six-letter word was a shock when it came a few days later. Whilst I’ve never been a believer in internet doctoring there’s enough stuff available to be able to sift out the information that counts and I’d done that, and worked it out, but also read enough to know that I wouldn’t be a “gonner” in the short term. Treatment started the following week and over the next 7 months I must have swallowed over 3,000 tablets; did over 250 self injections and eventually in September 2017 underwent a stem cell transplant.
People talk about the debilitating impact of chemotherapy and in my innumerable hospital visits I saw this. But I consider myself incredibly lucky that although the stuff led me to feel “strange” there was none of the nausea and other side effects you hear about. But it did leave me feeling tired and led me to stepping away from the keyboard for a long time – I just didn’t have the energy to sit down and concentrate.
Writing now, (November 2018), I am in complete stringent response with a reasonable short-term prognosis, but they don’t call it remission, because right from the outset I was told that the condition was treatable, but not curable. So it is coming back. When I don’t know but hopefully a long time in the future. I go to the consultant every three months and the hope as I approach his door is that he uses the same words that he has done so far…. “It’s good news….”
But……..
Retirement wasn’t supposed to be this way…..
I’ve never been a betting man – don’t do the lottery and stay well away from the on-line stuff as well. The extent of throwing away cash has been limited to social gatherings at the races when I’ve gone with the express intention of “investing” a certain sum, (for laughs), and the absolute certainty that I wouldn’t be returning home with it. But for those who do like a flutter I suspect that there would be pretty long odds on what I am about to outline.
In May 2017 Julie had been for the regular mammogram test that she religiously attended. We both thought no more about it until a letter dropped onto the mat asking her to go to the Nightingale Centre at Wythenshawe Hospital. We duly attended and were told that she had, in laymans terms, breast cancer. What would the odds on both of us being diagnosed with cancer in the space of six months, neither of us having had any history whatsoever of ill-health? She had to have a lumpectomy, but the gutting thing that it was done whilst I was in isolation after the stem cell transplant. So I couldn’t be there.
And here I have to say a huge, and heartfelt thanks to sons Rob and Mark, and of course their respective partners, Katy and Lauren, for all their support, help and of course love at that time. After the operation there was a course of radiotherapy for Julie. So, all in all, 2017 was a complete write off.
Retirement wasn’t supposed to be this way…..
It would be easy, I suppose, to say all of this wasn’t fair. We both, however, took a far more positive view. Instead of saying “Why me” we preferred to say “Why shouldn’t it be me”. After all in the Tameside area where we live 1,250 people, (out of a population of around 200,000), are diagnosed each year and there is no reason, either physical or otherwise, why you have the right not to be one of them. So it’s been a case of managing what we have faced, and with a first grand-child due in the next 6 or 7 weeks there’s so much to look forward to, and also to reflect on the care and treatment we have received.
So it’s a big thanks to all the staff at Tameside; Wythenshawe; Royal Oldham and Manchester Royal, and also to the staff at St Andrews Practice in Stalybridge who initially identified the markers in my blood tests/ Without them I wouldn’t be sat here typing now.
Oh, and by the way, 21 months have passed since I put pen to paper about Brisbane Road. No energy or inclination to do it. The enthusiasm has finally returned and it’s time to think about the Abbey Stadium, which is where we turn next.
November 2018
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